Coming soon to your favorite bike shop! And by soon I mean today! And by your favorite bike shop I mean us!

This is the sale of sales. We’ll have our usually incredible assortment of unbearably great deals, including the locally famous Cinderella Rack. If you’ve never been a part of the Cinderella sale, it is a unique experience of shopping bliss. No one will leave without fresh new threads and a smile. New items will be added every day, and if you’re out of town don’t worry, we’ll keep this running through the 10th of January. Don’t miss it.

Saturday means new stuff we think is cool. In order to push the cool-o-meter into the red, we’re posting our staff picks. Everybody’s favorite toys and tools. After each one shows up on the main page, it’ll get archived in the Staff Picks section of the site navigation, so when your uncle’s sister’s birthday rolls around and you don’t know what to get a budding triathlete, you can consult our resident tri-geek Nic’s personal favorites. Just that easy.

So Paul. Take it away.

• Lezyne Multitool - 12 functions, unbreakable chrome vanadium construction, lightweight, simple design
• New World Disorder 9 (Never Enough Dirt) DVD - Awesome. Nuff said.
• Polar F11 Heart Rate Monitor - Great functions in a great price. Everything for the cycling enthusiast including heart rate zones, audible alarms, pre-programable settings, button-free operation.
• ‘09 Specialized Tarmac Pro - Superlight frame, Shimano’s newest Dura-Ace group, Fulcrum Racing One wheels and a front triangle big enough for Chrispy’s head.



• Our Floor Polishing Manager and Resident Framebuilder #1 (Brian) is modeling the latest in Christmas ornamental fashion. Everything dangling from Brian’s lips and lobes is available at the shop and handmade by Chris Behm, Artist At Large. All peices are made entirely from worn out and recycled bike parts.

Ever seen one of those crazy-light 7 pound road bikes with the carbon chainrings and drilled out handlebars? The type of bike that only appears at industry shows and bike-dork websites? Those things are cool, but completely unrideable. Racers may dig light stuff, but those of us who have to buy our own gear also want equipment that won’t fold in half ten feet from the start line, or the trailhead, or the coffee shop. Here at Criterium, we’re not too focused on the 7 pound road bike, but we do have our own two-wheeled unicorn. It’s called The Durable Sub Twenty Pound Full Suspension Mountain Bike. And thanks to Specialized’s new S-Works Epic (you know, the one that Sauser smashed everyone to win the World Championships on) we have another crack at it.

This chunk of sweetness came out of the box at 22.8 pounds. At 4 inches of suspension travel front and rear, that’s almost unheard of. So the mission now is to see how light we can take it without compromising the ride quality or the durability. When we’re finished, this bike should be able to withstand something like the Leadville 100 without any mechanical failure or discomfort to the rider. We’ll keep you updated on the bike’s progress. Last time we tried this we got a Cannondale Scalpel Team down to 20.08 lbs, so we’re aiming to beat that this time. Top Gear Two Wheeled Edition. Stay tuned.

Maybe we should keep the TV theme going and start a Pimp My Globe contest. Or maybe we already started. Guess you’ll just have to come to the shop and see.

In other non TV-related news, our humble website is in the midst of its own Winter Overhaul Special. The old site at www.criterium-bicycles.com has been shut down, and this is now our main home. If you check to the right, you’ll notice some new bits. Under the Navigation section, we have connection pages to our rental rates, a list of current sweet deals, a description of our fitting services and a new rides section. This is all still under construction, so keep checking back. The Rides section in particular has a long way to go.

So that’s all for today from our snow cave here on the Santa Fe Trail. Stay warm, keep the coffee hot and the music loud.

Looks like once again the gas cost pendulum is swinging back in the direction of “almost affordable.” Funny how that always happens in the winter, eh? Then all of a sudden, summer breaks and prices go through the roof just as the words “road trip” are crossing everyone’s mind. Just like last year, and the year before that, and the year before that. The cause is pretty plain to see. Oil is dwindling and companies are squeezing every last dollar out of us before it’s too late, and they know people drive more in the summer. SO what can we do about it? People like to say that there is no easy solution, but that sounds like an easy excuse to keep up the status quo. As an average citizen, you may not be able to solve the problem on the political side of the spectrum (aside from voting), but there is something everyone can do to improve the energy usage situation for yourself, your family and everyone else. You ready for this?

Ride your bike.

Ride your bike to work once or twice a week when it’s nice. Ride your bike to the store when you just need a few things for dinner. If a trip is just a couple of miles, try it on two wheels instead of four. After a while, you may find that a majority of trips are better when they’re human powered instead of petrol powered. The cost of a new bike is offset a little more every time you ride it instead of climbing into a car, and after you’ve offset your costs, your transportation fees come to a cup of coffee and a sandwich instead of a 60 dollar tank of gas. Or, in the summer months, a hundred dollar tank of gas.

If you’ve never used your bike to commute before, if you need something more reliable, or you’re unsure about the details, come see us. Don’t like road bikes? We have piles of new Globes
just waiting for owners. Don’t like the cold? We have all the jackets, hats and gloves your heart and shivering fingers could desire. Have kids to take to school? We have trailers. Want to commute but don’t want to give up your racy speed machine? We’ve got the new super-hot Cannondale cross bikes. These things are stupid light, bombproof and an awesome inky satin black. Maybe you can’t throw down for a full new bike yet? No problem, we’re running an overhaul special, so we can get your current bike commute ready for half the normal price.

So really, there’s no reason not to take a few trips by bike every week. Especially when the sun is shining and the roads and trails are dry. We won’t take no for an answer.

Do you like birthdays? Because I do. Everything about birthdays is good. Presents, parties, cakes, presents, etc. Cake is pretty good too. I mention this because we’re still in the throes of post Happy Birthday Cake-A-Thon sugar crash thanks to everyone’s favorite Iron Man Nic turning the big three-oh yesterday. My biggest problem with birthdays is trying to figure out what incredibly awesome gift will make the cut. Perhaps a zazzy new belt made from a cyclo-cross tire (handcrafted by the talented Criterium mechanic Chris B.)? Or maybe the birthday boy or girl could use the new Triathlete’s Training Diary? Or if that’s not rad-tacular enough for you, the Surly Jethro Tule will fit the bill for “raddest present ever.” For the fixie, singlespeed or track rider this thing is awesome. A 15m wrench, a really heavy keychain and a beverage opener all in one handy tool.

The thing even has an integrated handle, which provides ergonomic pleasure for your palm under the most rigorous wheel-removing operations.

Speaking of presents, according to major retailers Christmas is Right Around The Corner. It’s imminent and unavoidable. Good thing Earth Studios just sent us a fresh new pile of tree ornaments, card holders, and various bike-related trinketry. Also on the horizon is some sweet new stuff from Resource Revival. Those guys make incredibly nice gifts from recycled bike parts. Couple of standouts include the chain and cog bottle openers (should be here next week),

and also on the way are the ever-calming cog and freewheel tea-lights.

If you’re still bummed because you missed Nic’s big dirty thirty, you can still get him a sweet gift for zero dollars. Just come by on Tuesday at 5:30 and challenge him to some trainer racing. Because a challenge is the greatest gift. Maybe second greatest to the Jethro Tule.

Trainer racing tonight! If you’re in the mood for a little suffering and some friendly competition without the risk of frostbite, get to the shop at around 5:30 every Tuesday and Thursday evening for our bi-weekly Compu-Trainer Pain-Scapade! Bring your bike, your shoes, maybe some shorts and an appetite for destruction. Each trainer is hooked up to a computer program which simulates a real road course which can range anywhere from a flat one mile drag race to a two thousand mile march all the way up Everest. Challenge your friends, challenge your enemies, see who can go nowhere the fastest. Or maybe just bring some snacks and practice your humiliation and heckling skills. It’s like heckling fish in a barrel.

Friday was like Christmas around here. We had barely finished our morning coffee when a semi truck parked itself out front and unloaded boxes and boxes of fresh new gear. There’s enough new Fox equipment to outfit a small trailriding army, including the new arm and leg armor, full face helmets, baggy shorts, killer jerseys and carbon-knuckled gloves. My personal favorites are the new Sergeant shorts, which are more comfortable than bon-bons and a handmade quilt. Another standout is the new Ranger short, which uses a much improved outer material and a grey (get ready for this) houndstooth pattern. What’s that you say? You’re not sure what Houndstooth is? Here’s a good example, as illustrated by the aforementioned 2009 Fox Ranger shorts:

These things are great, and if you’re not sure how to complete your look, here’s a few ideas:

In cold weather like this, a sweet scarf like this baby would not only match your new shorts, but would fight the fall chill. If you really want to turn it up a notch, I’d suggest going all the way to 11 with these fine units:

There’s only one word to describe a shoe like that. Zazzy. Sadly the Management here at Criterium is not so receptive to carrying houndstooth patterned Chuck Taylors, but I’ll keep working on it.

If Olde English style isn’t your cup ‘o tea, how about Olde Style Beer style?

And yes, we have this in stock. It is beautiful. The only jersey more beautiful than that one would have to look like this:

Get one for yourself, get one for your relatives in the Midwest, get one for your dog, because (almost) everybody loves beer. And houndstooth. Sometimes both at the same time.